Beginning the Journey

I hate running.

There's no other way to say it really. I don't remember there ever being a time where running just to run was something that I enjoyed. Sure, during volleyball in high school I ran a ton but that was never just to run. It was sprints to build up conditioning for game time. How quick could you move and could you do those short bursts of speed for and hour? Two?

I'm proud to say that I was one of the most agile people on my volleyball teams all through growing up. Even at 5'8" and one of the taller girls on the team, I was beating the setters and DS/backrow girls in shuttle runs, ladders, and Russians. (nasty drill involving lots of block jumps and sprinting to the end line or ten foot line, followed be dives, rolls, etc) Probably the closest that I got to "long distance" or "endurance" running is stair laps. We'd run them for what felt like hours (it was really probably 15 minutes) at the beginning of the season because they seemed to be a quick way to build your legs up again if you were a lazy bum during the summer.


What I discovered after high school and the removal of my near daily workouts due to either volleyball playing or coaching, is that without a goal, I have a very hard time working out. I don't mean a goal like losing 10 pounds. I mean a goal like "I'm running my ass off and throwing my body around a gym floor so I can play in a game on Saturday and do well" or "I'm a team captain so I have to work my hardest to set a good example." I don't have this anymore.

When it's just you and you have no one to account to, it's hard to want to move when you don't have to. Why would I go out and run myself ragged when I could stay cozy on the couch and read or play a video game? I know that there are people who would cry out and say "But your health! Your body! You won't be 22 forever!" etc etc, guilt trip express.

Overall, I'm a pretty health person. I eat well, partially because I would rather feel better for eating my veggies, and partially because I have to. Tyler (husband) has gone through a variety of diets to try and help figure out his guts issues so I've become very good at incorporating veggies, lean meats, and different grains. Work forces me to move around quite a bit.....most of the time. When I'm on a project, I'm running in all directions for a good chunk of the day. Lots of up and down stairs and ladders so overall a decent work out. During planning though, there's about 4 main walking times, to and from the car, at lunch (if I decide to go somewhere), and the token walk to the tech code.

I have a Fitbit Charge and surprisingly even on the days that are planning driven, I still get around 8,000-9,000 steps because my office building is in the middle of the yard so it's a bit of a jaunt to get anywhere from it. So it's not as though I'm completely inactive. In fact, I know that I'm more active than a lot of people out there but it's not where I want to be at.

I am unhappy with my body. (how strange that is to finally write down) It's not because I feel like I'm fat. Yes there are a few extra pounds that I'd like to get rid of but I think that's normal. I'm unhappy because I can still remember all those volleyball games and practices where I could do whatever workout they threw at me. All the early morning plyos that I did during the summer to prep for the next season. All those things that kept my body in the shape that I wanted. I'm just not in that kind of shape now and that is the most frustrating thing in the world.

I want to get back there.....or at least as close as I can. I know that I'm not young and invincible anymore. True 25 isn't old, but some of those volleyball injuries are catching up to me. I just need to be smart and get started.

That's where Scout and Auggie come in. Our ridiculous puppies that are just as good at cuddling as they are at catching frisbees (which is really good). Both of them are in good doggie shape, but would appreciate more activity from their constantly tired parents. My plan is to take turns taking them running with me since the guilt trip that I lay on myself about how bored they must be is better motivator it seems than needing to get in shape. Auggie will be up first.

Unfortunately, that first day is going to have to wait. It's pouring rain (which I love but hit at the wrong time to keep me motivated) and my ankle is hurting when I walk (I suspect my flats aren't helping me). BUT! The weather is supposed to be better tomorrow and at the very least I plan on going for a walk.

It's not much of a start, but it is one, and honestly, isn't that the hardest part?